Marbella’s Summer Madness: A Vietnam War Analogy
In the midst of the chaos that is summer in Marbella, one can’t help but draw parallels to the Vietnam War. The Marines in Vietnam used to cope with the madness around them by imagining it wasn’t real. They would count down the days until their tour of duty would end and they could return to “The World”. As we enter the third week of August in Marbella, the similarities are uncanny.
Marbella’s Tourism Boom: A Field of Dreams
After two years of dwindling tourist numbers due to ‘This, That and the Other’, the ‘Holiday Genie’ was finally let out of the bottle. The phrase ‘If you build it, they will come’ from ‘Field of Dreams’ perfectly encapsulates Marbella’s season. The only difference is, in Marbella’s case, it’s ‘If you open it, they will come. Eventually. When they get through the horrendous traffic and find a place to park’.
Observing the Lemming-like Behaviour in Marbella
As a long-term Marbella resident, I always avoid Banus at this time of year. However, observing the traffic queueing to get into ‘The Port’, I realised I was witnessing a classic case of Lemming-like behaviour. Despite the obvious overcrowding, people still insist on pushing through.
Summer in Marbella: The Arrival of ‘Hobson’
Every summer, Marbella sees the arrival of ‘Hobson’, one of my closest friends. Our almost telepathic sense of humour is a highlight of our lunches, where he finishes my sentences while I finish his sardines.
A Grit-Your-Teeth Moment at a Beach Sunday Lunch
During one of our traditional beach Sunday lunches, I experienced a ‘grit your teeth and don’t respond to the Madrileños’ moment. Our group was discussing the recent fires and the brilliance of the firefighting planes’ pilots when a sour-faced Madrileño couple on the next table began to shush and scold us.
Madrid Couple’s Unpleasant Encounter
The polo-wearing pijo from Madrid told us off, saying, “This is a restaurant. Not your living room!”. At this point, Hobson had to restrain me from going into full Withnail in the Penrith Tea Room mode.
Marbella’s Beach Body Armour Trend
Considering the national press was full of reports of people whipping out automatic weapons in beach clubs earlier in the month, I can only assume that the mirthless Madrid couple were either heavily armed themselves or were sporting the latest in Casual Kevlar Beach Body Armour.
Countdown to the End of Summer
‘Only a few days to go before they scurry back to Salamanca, dear boy’, advised Hobson, reaching for the ice bucket. As summer draws to a close, Marbella residents can finally breathe a sigh of relief.